Monday, April 27, 2009

Blame Canada

Okay, am I paranoid…or is there a pattern emerging in the past few months?

--Janet Napolitano, head of U.S. homeland security, says that some of the 9/11 Hijackers came from Canada. Canada tries to straighten out the matter, then John McCain reinforces the myth.
--Natasha Richardson dies in a tragic skiing accident in Quebec and some U.S. pundits blame “socialized medicine.”
--Worst of all, a month ago Fox News featured a late night show—Red Eye— slagging the Canadian military. I didn’t think it worth commenting about at the time, as it seemed like a mindless, media wingnut spouting inanities at the wee hours of the evening…

But now it extends up to the Secretary of Homeland Security and she’s a member of the new President’s team and, and, well, he loves us…doesn’t he? So what gives?

Taken all together, I think the truth is clear. It’s been staring me in the face all these years and I haven’t noticed. As much as I hate to say this, Canada is a land of vile terrorists, gutless soldiers and incompetent doctors. There, I’ve said it. I’ve broken through my denial. Thank you America for showing me the light. I once was blind, but now I see. I’m moving back ASAP…

2 comments:

Bill Templeman said...

Mongrel, you are missing the most crucial, closet issue in US-Can relations: Water. When Ceasar's Palace can't fill its pool in Vegas, when Jerry Seinfeld can't wash his cars in NYC, when Cher can no longer buy organic California watermelons, your homeland will not hesitate to help itself to Canada's water. Fox is just softening up the home crowd for the salvation of the next failed state.

Border Mongrel said...

As long as there's enough to fill the bowl that's next to my Kibbles, I'll be happy...

My quick guess: water will eventually become a commodity,ruled by Nafta, water resource companies will be listed on the stock exhange..the market will rule...